“Speaking of groins… PJ Stock” -Ron Maclean with the best segway in hockey (Ron's not a player but it sure was funny)
“Typical of most French guys in our league with a visor on, running around and playing tough and not back anything up.” –Sean Avery
“People think common sense is common - but it's not.” –Don Cherry
“You're the reason the league doesn't have a national television deal. You're a (terrible) announcer and you were a (terrible) player.” –Sean Avery on Former NHL goalie Brian Hayward
"How would you like a job where, every time you make a mistake, a big red light goes on and 18,000 people boo?" -Jacques Plante
"I went to a fight the other night and a hockey game broke out." -Rodney Dangerfield
“He should be worried about playing the game, not innovating it. He thinks he's Brett Hull or something. You should remind him that he didn't go to college. He's a junior (hockey) guy. So he's not that bright." -Garth Snow, Islanders’ goalie and university graduate, after hearing Jeremy Roenick’s complaints about the officiating in a Flyers-Islanders game
"It's not my fault (Snow) didn't have any other options coming out of high school. If going to college gets you a career backup goaltender job, and my route gets you a thousand points and a thousand games, and compare the two contracts, it doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure out whose decision was better." -Roenick, Flyers’ center and graduate of the Quebec Major Junior Hockey League, responds
"I just don't know what to think. I play in Colorado, they tell me they like me, and I get traded. I play in Calgary, and at the end of the season the GM tells me he likes me, and I get traded. I just hope my fiancee doesn't tell me she likes me." -Chris Drury, after a July trade from Calgary to Buffalo
“We can't have stupidity in our locker room and we can't have stupidity on the ice. The stupidity has all been used up plus some in the NHL this year. The stupidity meter is broken."
- Flyers' center Jeremy Roenick (Sun media, April 2)
“"He asked that Mr. Bettman and Mr. Goodenow know that they are 'skunks' for denying him the pleasure of watching the NHL on TV this year. He also asked that Mr. Bettman step aside and give Wayne Gretzky the job that rightfully belongs to him." -From the obituary for Archie Bennitz, a hockey fan who died in January at the age of 84. Bennitz asked that a message to the NHL be included in his death notice. (Ottawa Citizen, Jan. 21)
"I'm not sure, I wasn't really paying attention, but I think he was trying to get out of the game." -Philadelphia captain Keith Primeau, after Flyers' goaltender Roman Cechmanek skated to centre ice and started yelling at his team's bench during the fourth game of the Ottawa-Philadelphia series
"Let's put it this way: if one of my brothers were standing in front of the bus last night and we were about to leave and he was on the other team, I'd have run over him. I wouldn't have called out first to ask him to get out of the way, either. That's my mentality, that's the way it is. I don't really care." -Blackhawks' coach Brian Sutter, during the Chicago-St. Louis series
"We should all just go outside, lie on our backs and look at the clouds. We have a better chance of figuring out the clouds then what's going on in this dressing room." - Chris Osgood confounded by the Wings and Scotty Bowman
In Chicago, Bob Probert crashed his motorcycle into a car. According to police reports, his blood-alcohol level was more than three times the legal limit and he told officers: "Just charge me with the usual."
Dan Patrick: "Brett, do you catch flak for listing crossword puzzles as a hobby?"
Brett Hull: "What Dan? Do I catch flak because I AM SO MUCH SMARTER than everybody else?"
“Trade Steve Yzerman? That's like asking me if I want to trade my son Jason for the kid next door." - Jacques Demers
"The top three worst things I've seen in hockey? The invention of the trap. The invention of the morning skate. And the invention of the extremely ugly uniform." -Brett Hull's analysis of the game
“It looks great and I see they used Domi's actual sized head for the model" -Roenick when asked what he thought of the new design at Center Ice in Chicago
Brendan Shanahan is ALWAYS good for a nice quote... or twelve“Typical of most French guys in our league with a visor on, running around and playing tough and not back anything up.” –Sean Avery
“People think common sense is common - but it's not.” –Don Cherry
“You're the reason the league doesn't have a national television deal. You're a (terrible) announcer and you were a (terrible) player.” –Sean Avery on Former NHL goalie Brian Hayward
"How would you like a job where, every time you make a mistake, a big red light goes on and 18,000 people boo?" -Jacques Plante
"I went to a fight the other night and a hockey game broke out." -Rodney Dangerfield
“He should be worried about playing the game, not innovating it. He thinks he's Brett Hull or something. You should remind him that he didn't go to college. He's a junior (hockey) guy. So he's not that bright." -Garth Snow, Islanders’ goalie and university graduate, after hearing Jeremy Roenick’s complaints about the officiating in a Flyers-Islanders game
"It's not my fault (Snow) didn't have any other options coming out of high school. If going to college gets you a career backup goaltender job, and my route gets you a thousand points and a thousand games, and compare the two contracts, it doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure out whose decision was better." -Roenick, Flyers’ center and graduate of the Quebec Major Junior Hockey League, responds
"I just don't know what to think. I play in Colorado, they tell me they like me, and I get traded. I play in Calgary, and at the end of the season the GM tells me he likes me, and I get traded. I just hope my fiancee doesn't tell me she likes me." -Chris Drury, after a July trade from Calgary to Buffalo
“We can't have stupidity in our locker room and we can't have stupidity on the ice. The stupidity has all been used up plus some in the NHL this year. The stupidity meter is broken."
- Flyers' center Jeremy Roenick (Sun media, April 2)
“"He asked that Mr. Bettman and Mr. Goodenow know that they are 'skunks' for denying him the pleasure of watching the NHL on TV this year. He also asked that Mr. Bettman step aside and give Wayne Gretzky the job that rightfully belongs to him." -From the obituary for Archie Bennitz, a hockey fan who died in January at the age of 84. Bennitz asked that a message to the NHL be included in his death notice. (Ottawa Citizen, Jan. 21)
"I'm not sure, I wasn't really paying attention, but I think he was trying to get out of the game." -Philadelphia captain Keith Primeau, after Flyers' goaltender Roman Cechmanek skated to centre ice and started yelling at his team's bench during the fourth game of the Ottawa-Philadelphia series
"Let's put it this way: if one of my brothers were standing in front of the bus last night and we were about to leave and he was on the other team, I'd have run over him. I wouldn't have called out first to ask him to get out of the way, either. That's my mentality, that's the way it is. I don't really care." -Blackhawks' coach Brian Sutter, during the Chicago-St. Louis series
"We should all just go outside, lie on our backs and look at the clouds. We have a better chance of figuring out the clouds then what's going on in this dressing room." - Chris Osgood confounded by the Wings and Scotty Bowman
In Chicago, Bob Probert crashed his motorcycle into a car. According to police reports, his blood-alcohol level was more than three times the legal limit and he told officers: "Just charge me with the usual."
Dan Patrick: "Brett, do you catch flak for listing crossword puzzles as a hobby?"
Brett Hull: "What Dan? Do I catch flak because I AM SO MUCH SMARTER than everybody else?"
“Trade Steve Yzerman? That's like asking me if I want to trade my son Jason for the kid next door." - Jacques Demers
"The top three worst things I've seen in hockey? The invention of the trap. The invention of the morning skate. And the invention of the extremely ugly uniform." -Brett Hull's analysis of the game
“It looks great and I see they used Domi's actual sized head for the model" -Roenick when asked what he thought of the new design at Center Ice in Chicago
"Over the years, Steve has come to understand I need the clicker. He says it's my security blanket." –Brendan Shanahan
The day after getting 40 stitches over his right eye because of a body-check from behind by Peter Forsberg, journalists ask the Red Wings winger if he plans on wearing a visor to protect his eyes “No I won’t. Don Cherry will be happy but my wife will be ticked off."
"You know, there's nothing better than making yourself dinner and watching Thursday night TV. Also, I just got a computer. And I'm fanatical about doing the laundry. There's nothing better than a stack of fresh, clean clothes. Except maybe a good movie. You know that creepy-looking guy you stare at two seats behind you, thinking who would come to a movie by himself? That's me." - Brendan Shanahan
“Watching a shootout is like admitting you watch Survivor or search the internet for porn." -Brendan Shanahan
"I don't understand why I can't hit that ball. I mean it's this big, slow, ball & I just can't hit the thing. Maybe if I could run the bases with the bat in my hand I would enjoy it more. I could hit players as I go by, you know just a little cuff in the chin & maybe catch the next guy behind the ear." - Brendan Shanahan on softball
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